Quiet Time and Small Steps

You know what's odd about being in Mourning?  It's not what you expect at all.  It's not what you thought it would be.  Take for instance, Easter Sunday.  I was so worried about how Easter was going to be for me and my mom and family and Easter came and went like any other day for us.  Today was very hard for us. Today, of all days, not a special day, but an ordinary day.  Ordinary days can drive you crazy with emotional mood swings.  It is in the daily mundane that there is much pain.  So I decided that I wanted to take a drive.  I asked my husband to go on a drive with me.  My mom was home with my sons and my dog Rudy who is in mourning as well. (poor lil guy)  I had two commitments with two special God sons today that I couldn't keep.  I feel bad about it and I love them so much, but I wasn't up to it.  I'm not ready to be around a lot of people right now.  I just want to be home, "nesting" if you understand.  I want to be in the garden, I want to lay on the couch, I want to put away laundry (okay maybe not that) and watch my sons play soccer outside.  I want to sing in my dogs ear as we swing on my front porch swing.  I want to breathe slowly.  That's what I want to do.  So that's what I did today.
We had no real plan, just a drive.  Everything is so green right now.  And so much is in bloom.  I did take some photos of my trees and a statue I got to honor Max my beloved friend and dog.  Have I mentioned how obsessed I am with trees.  I love trees, love photos and paintings of trees.  They are spiritual and symbolic and peaceful.

Here is the sweet statue I bought to honor Max.
Our drive through Bucks County led us to Black Eyed Susan's.  Okay so I wanted to show my husband the new store.

Check out the entrance to the new store.  Don't forget to Breathe!  I know it's amazing.  Here are some more for you to see.

Love these Dog paintings.  I have acquired several dogs paintings and sculptures in my home already.  I told Susan when we build Rob's den, I want a dog theme just like this.
This is the upstairs.  It is breathtaking.  This is where Joanne makes her exquisite flower arrangements.
I could sleep here.  Right there on the corner below the roses.  I wouldn't take up much room.
I love the stone and the beautiful oversized armoires and cabinets.  I would need to buy a new house to fit them.  I only have 8 foot ceilings.  Darn it!
I did buy some lovely things.
Does this bag just scream me?  It's my blog colors.  I loved it and had to buy it.  I also bought a lovely kloche.  Have no idea if I spelled it correctly or even called it by it's correct name.
It is a glass dome that goes over anything you want.  I bought a lovely birds nest on a stand.  It is lovely.
Afterwards, we stopped at a lovely place that sells Antiques and Statues from Paris.  It is an experience to even walk on the grounds.  They actually have a peacock on their property.  You see I wasn't exaggerating.
I think she was a bit cold.  But beautiful.
I felt like I was in Versaille.  it was truly magnificent.
I enjoyed walking peacefully through such a lovely place with my husband today.  It felt nice and I was at peace.  I'm not saying I didn't have my moments of pain, but it was a start.  Small steps every day and a lot of prayer.


Alexie said...

Sweet sister, you are so right that God gives us beautiful things to fill our hearts with joy when we are down. They are a small reflection of God because, of course, we can't even imagine the beauty that heaven holds. You remind me of the scripture:

Philippians 4:8
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."

SO keep taking the long drives and soaking in the beauty all around you. Feel God's embrace and know you are loved.


Denise said...

You are so right about the ordinary days being some of the hardest! Sundays are always hardest for me because my mom and I always planned and cooked dinner together (sometimes she did most of the planning and prep!). Now it feels so empty without her by my side in the kitchen. I have to say that, while I am very sorry for your loss, it somehow makes me feel better to have a blog partner in mourning.

Thanks for sharing some photos of Susan's store! We had to leave before it was finished and it's really fun for me to see the final product.

Susan said...

Although I am a bit behind in catching up, I am so honored to have my store as part of your post and therapy!! I heard about your visit from all and wish I had been there. The photos are just fabulous, some of the best! Thank you for loving my store and me.

Mourning is such a funny thing, isn't it? I do very well, and then the smallest thing will set me into a sobbing fit! Denise had the best idea in requesting several tokens that could be used on demand to visit with mother and ask direction and opinions! I do like the token idea, for sure! Maybe our sweet parents are having a dinner retreat together and sharing stories about us together. I know it's a good place.

Love you. Susan

Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...