12.30.2015

Another Year Over

These are from one of my Juniper trees in the back of my property.  I have two identical ones.  They are very old and for years I have always looked forward to their lovely juniper berries.  I love to adorn centerpieces with them and mantels.  They are so lovely to me.  About 8 years ago, one of my junipers suffered the loss of two large branches due to a heavy snow fall.  Then shortly after, a few years later and another snow fall we heard a loud crackling sound.  Our beloved tree had lost yet another limb this time cracking the tree almost in half two thirds of the way down.  My husband expressed that he believed that was the end of our tree.  We would have to remove it because of the way it looked after the loss of three significant branches and now a split from the top.  I fought to keep the tree and said it would heal, and argued that somehow it would be fine.  I got my husband to submit to my way of thinking and we allowed the tree to continue to live, heal and grow.    It truly is a miracle to see it today.  Unless you were familiar with what it lost, an onlooker would never suspect  what it has lost over time.  

As I walked my dogs a few days ago I cut this little piece.  I stood in amazement at it's grandeur and beauty and as I peered into it I could see it's scars.  It's missing points and crack but the other limbs have some how covered the imperfections and he still stands proudly across from his sister tree.  (if it is a female I don't know, it just sounded nicer for my post)
I chose to post about it because I find I have a kinship to it's story.  

Over the past few years I have suffered greatly mentally with the loss of my father, the mental deterioration of my mother, guilt and pain from the past with her only recently understood mental illness and finally the grief of her passing.  It aged me, weathered me, and I felt cracked and filled with scars.  But with all things, time heals, mends and fixes our imperfections, our pain and scars.  It enlightens us and allows us to see the past in a different light.  With time we are more forgiving, less likely to take umbrage or hold grudges.  

I find that I am now like my juniper tree.  Only those closest to me know what I have lived through and how it has changed me.  Yet I stand and continue to grow and reach for new beginnings and new experiences.  The scars become less likely visible and I am able to find new confidence and strength and ultimately . . . happiness.

2015 was a year filled with ups and downs, bittersweet moments and also at the same time joy.  As we embark on the new year 2016, I pray for peace for our country.  I pray for strength, support and a safe haven for our soldiers and their families for what is to come.  And I also pray for a year of enlightenment.  I wish to be less fearful and more adventurous.  I would say to be worry free but who am I kidding?
And most of all I wish all of you, my blogging friends, A miraculous year of love, peace and joy.
God bless and Happy New Year!



2 comments :

Stacia Allison said...

Peace be with you.

Marilyn said...

A truly beautiful, insightful post and one we can all relate to. No one goes through life unscathed. No one. We need to be like your juniper, to move forward, to heal and to concentrate on growth.

Wishing everyone a new year of good health, happiness and prosperity.

Marilyn (in Dallas)

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